Tuesday, October 20, 2009

Is Your Woman Faking Orgasm?

Oh my God... oh yes, oh yes, yes, yes! You're the best... or maybe you're not. It's quite possible that your woman has been faking her way through lovemaking this entire time.

Why would she? , you ask yourself. Well, the reasons vary, but you need to know if she is indeed faking and what you can do to make sure that her Oscar-nominated performance is the real thing. And believe it or not, according to the Sex Files, over 70% of women (and hey, 25% of men) admit to faking the feeling.

VAGINAL VS .CLITORAL

Some women swear by clitoral orgasms while others prefer G-spot or vaginal orgasms, and of course, there are the lucky few that enjoy both. Obviously, many women achieve clitoral orgasms with less difficulty because the clitoris is easier to locate and manipulate than say the G-spot.

So when you're penetrating her, unless you're manually rubbing her clitoris with your fingers or are in the rear-entry position whence your testicles are tapping against it periodically, chances are she won't have a clitoral orgasm.

Traditional sex doesn't usually stimulate a woman as greatly as it does you, so straight sex (like the missionary position) won't always garner the results both of you are looking for. But keep in mind that some women do not have difficulty orgasming whatsoever. If you have one of those women, more power to you.

HOW IS SHE FAKING?

There are plenty of ways that she might be leading you to believe that she has achieved the almighty orgasm. The most popular include:

# Mechanical moaning
# Her noises don't flow in accordance with what's happening
# You don't feel her PC muscle gripping your penis periodically
# Her breathing goes from heavy to normal in an instant


Remember that if your woman does these things, it doesn't necessarily mean that she's deceiving you, she could be in fact, reaching orgasm. All women are different and orgasm in different ways. In the same vein, there are women who are so convincing in their orgasms that you'll likely never figure out that they're faking it.

Between physical, verbal and whatever else women can do to convince their lovers that they've hit the letter O, sometimes you'll never know what she's really experiencing. It all really depends on the actress.

WHY IS SHE FAKING?

Once you understand why women fake it, you won't be as miffed as you likely are at this very moment. Nowadays, a lot of emphasis is placed on the woman's ability to orgasm and some would say that it not only measures your performance as a lover, but hers as well.

She doesn't know what an orgasm feels like
Believe it or not, many women have never even experienced an orgasm, so when they feel a little tickle or tingle within, they think to themselves, oh, this must be it ; they therefore proceed to put on a performance like the ones they see in movies.

She gets sore really fast
Blame it on her own PH balance or the lack of KY, whatever combination of letters you choose, she might get sore down there quickly and because of her discomfort, she acts like she's reaching her climax so that you can reach yours and it'll all be over and done with.

She doesn't want to hurt your ego
You can deny it all you want, but if you thought you weren't pleasing your woman (or women, you dog you), chances are it would make you question your abilities as a lover. So she fakes it and your mind is at ease that she's satisfied. Believe me, when men don't reach orgasm with us, we're just as crushed.

You think it's so important
Some days are better than others, and while she might reach multiples one day, the next day might result in none. That doesn't mean she didn't enjoy the lovemaking, it just means she didn't orgasm. Stop making it the be all, end all of the sexual experience or she'll never stop faking it.

WHAT CAN YOU DO?

It's a shame when women fake it because they lead guys to believe that what they're doing is awesome. Guys keep doing it, women keep faking it and the result is a negative one in the long run.

Many women are least likely to reach orgasm through penetration alone, so you'll have to get a little creative with your sexual attitude (and so will she).

Talk about it: The first thing you need to do is discuss your sexual habits. You'd be surprised how many people don't communicate about this important subject.

Experiment with sex: Whether it's new locations or positions from the Kama Sutra, try different things from time to time.

Do erotic things together: Whether it's watching sensual movies or feeding each other chocolate covered strawberries, make an effort to keep your sexuality alive in other aspects of your lives.

Get her to explore her own body: Your woman might be hesitant at first, but encourage her to discover her own body by rubbing her own genitals and playing with her nipples. Perhaps if she discovers what pleases her, she can show you.

Invest in an enhancer: Some women have no idea what an orgasm feels like and due to the constant vibration, a sex toy usually does the trick. Buy one and rub it against her clitoris while using your penis or fingers to penetrate her. Chances are she'll reach orgasm in no time.

CHANCES ARE

If she's faking it, she's likely doing it for selfless reasons, after all, she doesn't win an actual Oscar, nor does she reach sexual satisfaction. She's just trying to ensure that you enjoy your orgasm and keep your ego intact. So don't get angry, rather try to discuss it and explore other ventures together.

Keep the lines of communication open and do your best to keep each other satisfied. Take your time -- sex is not a race. Explore every inch of her body and hey, props never hurt anyone (unless you're into that sort of thing). Don't let this issue cut you to the bone...

By Vanessa Burton

http://www.askmen.com

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